The first time I experienced psychedelics I had some l with some good w. I will never forget that day. It was the 27. 04.19. I will be eternally thankful to H.J and K.R for taking me on this trip, for their guidance and for still being here for me. They showed me the path and guided, though they still do, throughout my way. Though I bad tripped at some point I enjoyed my trip. This trip brought me so much. The most important thing I understood was that I had to accept myself, my flaws and my qualities. I was struck just like getting a direct punch from Mike Tyson right. I began thinking about all my good and bad deeds and the reasons that were behind my actions. The person I was seeing before me, though it was me was totally unknown to me. I was disappointed by myself. I felt an urge within the deepness of my heart to be back to myself. There started my introspection. I was struck by so many things, for example by understanding that so many people that I was treating more that blood ties brothers were only using me, my physical force, my courage and that since the begin they were only stopping me from being me and from doing the right things, etc. I understood that happiness wasn't something that you had to hunt to find it. Happiness was there, at arm range, waiting to be taken. I understood that the first thing was to accept myself as an imperfect person, with my flaws and qualities. I understood that grieving and thinking about my past mistakes over and over again and again was useless. I had the choice, either to make up and move forward or stay here whimpering over the past. I decided to move forward but intelligently. With the advices of K.R and H.J, I understood that I had to accept my past and use it as an experience for my present and future. I also understood that I had to forgive myself for all the bad deeds I did. Though it seemed easy to do, it wasn't at all. As at today, there are still so many things that I am still trying to forgive myself. But once I started on this path, I began to feel better. I felt a new sensation, a new feeling, a feeling of self peace, of love, of care. Since that day I use each day as an opportunity to be a better person than I was yesterday and also as an opportunity to make up for everything I did. I also discovered the happiness I felt when I was helping others without expecting anything back. I have always been looking for my place in the world and I finally found it. I thank H.J and K.R for they helped me to awaken myself. 

Though today I am still a new comer in the psy universe, I am eager to learn more about myself and to be a part of the psy community worldwide. I find my joy in helping others. As a mauritian song says: "Now that my third eye has been opened..." I am grateful I had the opportunity to have such a wonderful, great, self building experience. I daily thank the universe for my life and for allowing me to be a part of it. 

​​This is a small summary of my first experience and it's results.

Last update on July 2, 7:09 am by C. L. Jonathan VEERASAMY.
PSYCHEDELIC.ORG
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C. L. Jonathan VEERASAMY, your post has been moved from the blog section to the forum section. Thanks for sharing :smile: